I had once become interested in Nikola Tesla, after one of the many nights I had been up between feeding the twins, and seen a discovery or history channel special about him.
Some of his thoughts, ideas and experiments were very interesting to me. I have a bizarre tendency to study many topics at the same time, because one question in one subject may lead me to the answer to a previous subject, or propel me into another subject matter altogether.
Some people find it is strange and confusing, I don't mind it for the most part, although it does exhaust me.
At one point my current study was or began in
- the religious arena and lead me down the path of compiling all the non canonical writings of the early church
- Which lead me to books that were tagged as "demonic" and "satanic", but, yet were part of the early Christian Church (just how can that be, no one has an answer for me)
- Then back to my first love of genealogy, still trying to figure out who the heck I am and why I have this strange knowledge of mine
- That sent me on sort of a witch hunt, I will elaborate at a later date
- Then back to my second fav of genetic research combined with organic/herbal remedies
- Which sent me back to witchcraft or "folklore" as some prefer to say
- To complete the circle again back at Quantum Physics
After going over this oddly associated and vaguely related subject matter, I also found myself to be in the habit of ignoring my own needs, thoughts and desires, and decided, after months of questioning and self doubt, something had to change, and it wasn't going to be me this time. But, for once, made up my mind I wanted to live my life like I have always wanted to, but let other people dictate to me otherwise.
It was at this point, I had a freaky unexplainable "planetary shift"per se , or some sort of bizarre "cosmic" occurrence. When out of nowhere, I came into contact with an experience that I can only describe at best as, "magnetic" or "electric". Can't think of any other words to describe it. Except for maybe intense.
What made me think of it again today was a similar reaction/sensation, and the use of the word, "inevitable". Lately, I've been paying more attention to words that I hear randomly in conversation with totally unrelated people, in completely different locations. At this point it gives me chills.
The only absolute thing I do know at this point, is I don't believe in coincidence. I also know from the time I was a very small child, I have had the uncanny ability to just "know" something. Be it an opinion about something or someone, or some understanding of a complicated scientific theory, some call it a hunch, or gut feeling, or instinct, or gifted. I don't have a word for it, or maybe I do, I think of it as a sensation.
I've always had this missing feeling, or felt that I had a question that I was looking for an answer to, and maybe that's why I study everything so in depth, trying to see if that's what I've been missing. I can't describe that part either, it's just a peculiar curiosity for knowledge, maybe.
However or whatever it is that causes it, I do know that I'm extremely curious to study this subject more intensely than I have wanted to study something in a very long time.
Back to earth as we currently know it.....only for the moment I think though ;)
Cause I do know all things are eventual and inevitable.
